Friday, April 27, 2012

Waiting for Baby

Waiting for baby, 8 months along - with a mystery baby who would be born not too long afterwards.

Surprising Moment

So I am gainfully employed for a bit, part-time and temporary through mid-August. I like my work, the environment, my co-workers and especially my supervisor whom I call "boss lady." This woman really could have been a grief counselor as she is a really great teacher, patient and calm, and an overall wonderful person.

I am at work and reviewing some forms...hey it's not too exciting but it's my job. And I see the name of a child. This child is a girl, this child is in 6th grade in our school District and I know this child's mom from my former life - the one 'before' - the one where I also worked but the one where people knew me 'before' I lost Solomon.

As soon as I see this child's name my heart skips a beat. I remember when this child was born, a few weeks after Solomon. I remember thinking how this child and Solomon would be in school together because this child's mom was one of the many whom I knew was pregnant with me. Then the obvious comes to the surface, no, Solomon will never be in school.

I had to stop what I was doing and just remind myself to breath. It was harder than I thought but I managed to get through the moment. But still I just wish sometimes there weren't moments I had to get through in the first place. You know?